You know you are addicted to the Internet when....
• You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com
• You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
• You start introducing yourself as "Julia(your name) at Net dot com"
• Your spouse drapes a black wig over your monitor to remind you of what she/he looks like.
• All of your friends have @ in their names.
• You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
• Your phone bill comes to your house in a box.
• You laugh at people with 2400 baud modems.
• You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
• You refer to going to the toilet as downloading.
• You tell the taxi driver you live at: http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html
• Your spouse makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
• You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a commode.
• You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
• You turn on your computer, and turn off your spouse.
• Your spouse says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer, and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
• You begin to wonder how on earth your service provider is allowed to call 200 hours per month "unlimited."